Monday Linkage...

For some reason I feel like people went pretty big this weekend. I'm guessing that yesterday you slept for 18 hours and spent the other 6 hours watching movies on TBS, yet you still have enough alcohol in your system that you shouldn't have driven to work today. Then you get to your desk, open Outlook, and see you have 63 unread emails because you stopped checking your inbox last Thursday at around 2pm out of spite. Now here's the debate: Do you check these worthless office emails or do you search the internet for nine straight hours. If you chose the latter, then continue reading below.

You could probably spend the rest of the day reading this site that makes fun of white people, which is what I'm sure I'll end up doing. It's got a lot of that 'it's funny cause it's true' humor, and there are a few posts that are remarkable.

I'm not sure why I like this site so much, but it's genuinely hysterical. It's a site that creates amusing Venn diagrams and other non-mathematical graphs about everyday things. After I had been reading for a few weeks I suddenly realized it was written by a woman, a fact that enthralled me to no end. I am both intimidated and infatuated with humorous women, which usually means they're going to walk all over me. I should probably email her.

This game is highly addicting, and pretty tough to master as well. Maybe I'm just saying that because I'm terrible at it, because some of my co-workers claim that they never lose. I'm not sure how that's possible.

Here's a non-office game that I frequently play whenever I have that inkling to destroy my body with liquor. At your local pub take three straws and connect them together to form a triangle. Then you and your degenerate friends take turns throwing this triangle in the direction of the stacked liquor bottles in front of you. If you happen to wrap your triangle around one of the necks you get to pick someone to take that shot. And they HAVE to take it. I've seen someone take a shot of vermouth before, which I can tell you my friends, did not look pleasant. By the way, you can also choose yourself which is what I end up doing half the time.

We have a big week planned over here at the cantbefired headquarters so get your dancin' shoes on. I'm actually being serious when I say I'm on Google right now trying to find the closest mattress store to my office so I can go take a nap. I figure if I buy a new mattress they'll let me sleep in their store for a few hours. It's a win-win.