Making Meetings Work for You

Meetings are a way of corporate life, and although they can be bland and sometimes downright excruciating, they've also been known to be a wonderful distraction from the daily grind. Anything that mixes up my eight hour day is fine by me, even if it involves sitting in a conference room for four hours talking about nothing. My only issue with meetings at this point in my career is that I'm not high enough on the corporate ladder to have any input into what is going on in, yet I still I have to attend. That is why I make sure I'm prepared.

If there is a meeting approaching with mandatory attendance, my first order of business is to print off a crossword puzzle, which can be done at the website of any major newspaper. Secondly, I make sure to arrive in the conference room at least ten minutes before the meeting starts in order to get a seat against a wall, or in a corner. Anywhere that ensures that no one is sitting behind you. When the meeting is in progress I open my nifty leather work folder and diligently begin on the crossword puzzle, although to anyone else watching it looks as if I'm taking notes.

It's not that I'm doing this to ignore everything that will be talked about during the meeting, since that will happen no matter what. When I first started attending these meetings I found that I would be on the verge of falling asleep after about 20 minutes because the majority of them are boring as hell. There is nothing more embarrassing then falling asleep in front of ten of your coworkers while the VP of the company is breaking down the goals for the upcoming quarter, trust me.

The crossword puzzle is just one aspect of getting through a two hour meeting, however. I make sure that I literally chug a large cup of coffee twenty minutes before, then refill the cup and take it into the meeting with me. Also, make sure you don't eat a large lunch or breakfast immediately before the meeting, since you'll be passed out on the floor before you know it.

"Surprisingly, manilla folders actually make decent pillows"

Another trick that I employ for every meeting I attend is the researched question. Even though there is no reason for me to be at half of these meetings, I like to have some input for a few reasons. First of all, if you ask at least one poignant question or produce one thoughtful statement in every meeting you attend, you'll be thought of as intelligent and determined by your peers, which may ultimately assist you in moving up through the company, if that's your ultimate goal. This is not why I ask questions, however. I discovered long ago that if you ask one question early on in the meeting, you can easily slip into the background, blending in with the rest of the go-getters and allowing you time to work on 14 Across (that's crossword talk).

Because I'm not paying attention to anything going on during the entire meeting, I usually come up with the questions beforehand, depending on the subject. If there is an upcoming meeting on the new software we're installing, and how the initial installation phase may have a negative effect on the output of work from our employees, then I will do a bit of research first. After the meeting has started and I'm trying to figure out the last name of the Best Actress Oscar in 1958, my ears will also be peeled for anything regarding the training process for the software. And when it does...

"Actually, I might be off base here, but I believe each set comes with a tutorial CD that will guide the employee through the software in about 30 minutes, which will be much quicker than sending them off to a training seminar. Just a thought."

Even if this idea is completely shot down by every one of your constituents, at least you've contributed something, and now you can get back to doing whatever you can to avoid falling asleep.

"Stop judging me, there was a Law and Order marathon on until 4am last night."